My boss and I had lived for a few years in Italy and Germany, respectively, but were both in the US again at this time and had a jokey rivalry about which of us had integrated better. She was looking for jazz music for our restaurant and said “god, I love scat. Don’t you?” and my dumb ass responded before I could think about it for a second “I’m not that German.” (For anyone confused, I don’t know why, but some Americans think Germans are into scat. I have not experienced this in any way, and have no idea if it’s at all based in reality, I was just making a joke I shouldn’t have)

She didn’t know what scatophilia was, did NOT enjoy hearing about it, but wouldn’t let it go until I explained my joke.

My grandmother refers to sex as “putting your shoes under his bed.” As in if you’re staying the night that where you would put your shoes after taking them off.

She’s been married 3 times and has kids with each of them. She knows exactly what’s going on. Don’t let them fool you.