I watch some YouTube channels that narrate crime events while doing makeup, to some people this might sound weird but it’s actually very comforting because it feels as if it was a friend telling you something that happened while you eat or do your own makeup yourself.
But I’m starting to notice that listening to these terrible things happening makes me more wary around other people in situations where normally I wouldn’t be overthinking so much. I’m scared about making friends in uni because what if any of them ends up being dangerous people?
This also translates to dating, I stopped going on dates because I keep thinking I’ll end up meeting my future murderer or rapist.
I’m even scared to meet my friend group this summer, we are going to a holiday chalet to spend some days in that house. I obviously know nothing is going to happen but I have this small worry that “what if they’re just plotting to kill me in that house” I might sound like I’m crazy right now.
But I can’t keep thinking that these paranoid thoughts would have saved a lot of the people in those true crime cases.
Anyone with a similar experience or am I schizophrenic? 😂
Admittedly it has affected my decisions, but to a lesser extent and not towards the people I meet in daily life. My paranoia is more focused on what an unexpected intruder could do, so I have fortified the entry points to my house a bit more.
The thing is that it’s more likely that someone you know does something terrible to you than a stranger intruding your house… I know it’s sad but most crimes of rape and murder are done by family or friends.