I get people giving me judgemental looks with the tablet at the dinner table when out in the wild. Im always tempted to take it off her when people look at me funny, they can see what happens.

Low volume blippi is annoying as shit, I get it, but also so is me running past your table every 30 seconds carrying her back, or the full-blown mortal screaming if I strap her to the chair.

I still dont get.

All I can hear is the lord of the rings tune

I think the secret sauce is critical thinking. No joke.

Sorta?

Did you have to get somebody to set your gear up for you or can you somehow do it all yourself?

Ive never been a woman, so I cant speak with authority here, but I think I’d like instructions about my moods like that.

“This is literally as unhappy as you’ll be this whole month, nows the time for that emergency ice cream.”

“You wont get hornier than this, if you feel like you owe your partner one, this is the best shot”

“This is the happiest day of your year. Buckle up champ its all downhill from here”

Pretty sure Biden was old, slow, senile and half-feeble but also a brilliantly devious political mastermind.

Ive never built up the courage to try even a single bubble tea, partly because its stupid expensive, but mostly because im worried about saying the wrong thing and having people think im strange. Like if you asked for extra sugar on your hot dog or something.

Finding that there’s mad purists arguing about what is or isnt doesnt make this any easier.

Got a 6 year old he spells pretty good

Rangers v Celtic?

Here in the UK we dont have exactly that problem. Wages go up every year. So does rent, council tax, food prices, utility bills, insurance premiums and luxury items.

If you do some crazy shit like work it out with a calculator what your expenses and incomes going to be, you might find that you think youre worse off overall because of how the numbers look in the wrong light.

But the wages went up. End of story.

I got your back no matter what

Well I just voted that youre not allowed to exist, so how’d you wanna do this?

I miss the internet

Especially with the Ricky prompting me, he looks a lot like Lahey in the thumbnail

You ad a bed!? Luxury!

There’s a lot of people who can’t afford dental care tbh. If you’re unemployed/disabled/whatever you qualify for free care, and if you’re in a good job you can afford it. If youre on minimum wage trying to make ends meet you dont qualify and cant afford it.

My experience- YMMV. Be careful who you talk to and what gossip you engage in. Basically everyone knows everyone to some degree. Everybody is somebodies cousins friend or something. Its a good thing when you get used to it, more security and whatever, but it does mean that any social damage you do (cheating on someone for instance) will have far wider consequences than you realise.

Job hunting is extremely difficult for the same reason unless you’re trained in some in-demand specialist skill. Every job goes to someone’s cousin. In my last factory job we had an idiot working there, constantly on the verge of getting sacked, he attended a funeral one day and discovered that his dead cousin was also cousins with the manager. He was team leader the very next week for his overall diligence to duty.

You’re cleared to grab 'em by the pussy, chief.

About once a week I’ll space out and quietly panic for a minute when I remember about death.

Its coming. One day. Forever. No avoiding it. No way out.

I’d assumed the female part was somehow relevant. I’m vaguely aware that in some parts of the world women dont have it as easy in others.