• Awa@lemmy.worldM
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    16
    ·
    2 days ago

    Zapp: “clear my schedule”

    Kif: takes out etch-a-sketch and shakes it

  • wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.com
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    11
    ·
    2 days ago

    I don’t have a favorite line, but this copypasta always comes to my mind when I think about Kif:

    I used to have 50,000 posts on a fucking really weird, small, Futurama forum. There were only about 50 posters on the entire board.

    For some reason I literally roleplayed as Kif (the frog who was a slave to Zapp Brannigan) in every single fucking post. I remember that the other posters would say things like ‘post your penis again for me Kif’ with a picture of Zapp and I would do it (after using photoshop to make my dick green).

    I was basically a fucking sex slave for 50,000 posts. I remember on one occasion a girl came onto the board and I really liked her, but instead of talking to her like a normal human I tried to pick her up by writing an extensive, 1200 word post describing the backrub I gave to Zapp Brannigan.

    I hate that part of my life almost as bad as I hate this current one.

  • mercano@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    22
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    2 days ago

    “Kif, that’s the pony I always wanted but my parents said I had too many ponies already.”

    “Yes, I programmed it in for you. 4 million lines of BASIC!”

    • geekwithsoul@piefed.social
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      2 days ago

      Is that the line? I always thought it was “I don’t share your love of velour” - but I’ve probably just been misquoting it for years.

  • Melllvar@startrek.website
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    17
    ·
    2 days ago

    For soon, the quivering mass of life within me will depend on us both. Even now, I can sense it feeding, squirming, searching, questing. And shortly, it will rend my loins in twain, burst forth and pull us down, down, down into the deep, dark waters of commitment.