• Lux (it/they)@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    15 days ago

    Homophobia

    I was raised in a right wing, rural area, and i didn’t meet a gay person til higschool. When he said he was gay, i assumed he was joking.

    Im trans now lol

      • Scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech
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        15 days ago

        There’s a reason cities are more liberal. Turns out being surrounded by different cultures, races, sexualities, and beliefs shows you that maybe they’re not so different. In a town of 15k middle American white folks, it’s hard to see another culture equally, let alone at all.

        Same thing with college. There’s no such thing as a liberal or democratic college. It’s just that people are simply surrounded by other people. You learn all of those weird rules and things you were taught don’t actually hold up, and that everyone is kind of the same

  • themeatbridge@lemmy.world
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    16 days ago

    Knee pain. Everyone told me it was normal growing pains, until one little league coach notice I run weird. Queue years of doctors and specialists and tests and scans and surgeries, and now I’m a 40 something guy with advanced arthritis that could have been much much worse if left untreated.

  • jpreston2005@lemmy.world
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    14 days ago

    I don’t know if this counts, but when I was little I’d go to friends houses, then later in high school to my first serious girlfriends house, and I remember their families were like… loving? I loved spending time at my girlfriends house especially, hanging out with her Mom and her Dad even if my gf wasn’t there. They were so nice, and you could tell had genuine affection for their children (and to some degree, me). I miss you Mr. and Mrs. Miller!

  • swelter_spark@reddthat.com
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    15 days ago

    I grew up thinking it was normal for grown men to be attracted to little girls. My mother had a habit of pointing out random men who just happened to be around and telling me they were staring at me/thinking about how beautiful I was/in love with my/trying to look up my skirt. The way she talked about it made it seem like it was a common, acceptable thing.

    • dumblederp@aussie.zone
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      14 days ago

      As a man, I was worried about that growing up, but the women I’m attracted to has aged with me. I’m friends with some women under 30 from the dog park, and I can appreciate they’re pretty but they also look like kids. I hope they meet nice guys around their age.

      • swelter_spark@reddthat.com
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        14 days ago

        I really wonder where they got this from! Strangely enough, when I was a teen and actually starting to get inappropriate attention from men, she would never believe that it happened.

      • swelter_spark@reddthat.com
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        4 days ago

        I distanced myself from her after college. Her behavior was unacceptable in a lot of ways, and she wasn’t willing to change. Thanks for the kind words.

  • Especially_the_lies@startrek.website
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    16 days ago

    Apparently, it isn’t normal to just space out during a test. Yeah, I went through K-12, undergrad, and grad school with an undiagnosed learning disability. This was only one of the symptoms…

      • WindyRebel@lemmy.world
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        15 days ago

        I’ve never been diagnosed with a learning disability and I would often space out sometimes during a test. The brain gets tired and needs a break/reset before going back to the task. Now, if it was constant or for long periods of time, maybe that’s different? I’m not a doctor and this person didn’t specify.

  • SharkEatingBreakfast@sopuli.xyz
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    15 days ago

    Excruciating period pain that would leave me fainting and vomiting every. Single. Time.

    “Every girl goes through this” said the doctor, convincing my parents that I was just “dramatic”.

    Turns out I had huge polyps growing out of control! Left scarring in my uterus and high-risk when pregnant.

    Dealt with that hell every fucking month since I was 11 until I got onto birth control in my 20s.

    • dmention7@lemm.ee
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      14 days ago

      My wife went through something similar. Took until she was in her 30s and we were pursuing IVF for someone to take her seriously and actually do the investigation to realize she had crazy scarring from endometriosis causing all kinds of issues.

      It’s insane to me how much the modern medical community seems to normalize or straight up ignore this shit, like you said.

      I realize we could have pushed harder, but when multiple doctors tell you “yeah, some women just experience periods differently, here’s 500mg Naproxen to help you through” you tend to believe it.

    • Paper_Phrog@lemmy.world
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      15 days ago

      Poor you! It must have been terribly frustrating that the doctor wouldn’t take you seriously. Seems to be a frequent thing women go through in the medical world. Hope you’re okay now.

      • SharkEatingBreakfast@sopuli.xyz
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        14 days ago

        It’s barbaric. They assume that if you’re girl/woman, most problems are basically “female hysteria”!

        Not even “it could be [blank], you might want to keep an eye on that and report back if it doesn’t go away.” Nope! Diagnosis: dramatic.

        And women die from this shit. Or become disabled / handicapped. Or it affects their long-term future if they want children. It’s awful.

  • Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world
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    16 days ago

    Being unable to think of something without a prompt.

    I guess most people can just remember things without sticky notes and calendars.

    • tetris11@lemmy.ml
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      16 days ago

      Genuinely. This is sadly how my memory works. It’s gotten better since I had a partner who I would talk to everyday with the inane question, “so how was your day?”

      Then suddenly I had to learn how to summarize recent aspects of my life.
      And then you’re like, “shit, that happened to me today? shouldn’t I be angry about that?

      • Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world
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        16 days ago

        I might be. Give me a topic and I’ll spew out all sorts of obscure trivia, but until you mention it, I don’t know that any of it exists.

          • Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world
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            16 days ago

            So, “Living” card games doesn’t mean anything to me, but you did trigger card games in general, which could take me a while. I’ve probably spent a majority of my waking life playing Magic, Poker, Hearthstone, Silver, Smash up, and various other card games. Most recently, I’m obsessed with Balatro.

            That being said…

            Are you about to open a Pandoras box by making me look up Living Card Games?

            • db0@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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              16 days ago

              Mate, if you’re into CCGs, you really missed out by not getting into LCGs! Android:Netrunner, a remake of the original Netrunner from the 90s is the absolute GOAT CG out there with a close second being the Doomtown:Reloaded (which I helped design). Basically it was CGs without the luck/gambling. Just get all the cards and make exactly all the decks you want.

              Unfortunately Netrunner and Doomtown run out of steam half a decade ago, but they’re still developed by their fans, but usually the only way to play them consistently is online in places such as Jinteki.net. There’s a few others still in production, but iirc they’re co-operative ones, like Arkham Horror

  • superkret@feddit.org
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    16 days ago

    Getting locked in the basement without water, or thrown out into the streets for half a day, when you misbehaved as a child.

    • tetris11@lemmy.ml
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      16 days ago

      I mean, yeah? Is that really so bad. I guess it depends what the intent was. The town I grew up in was pretty tame, and the room I’d get locked in without food or water if I’d misbehaved had books

      • MoonlightFox@lemmy.world
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        15 days ago

        I was locked outside of the house for long periods of time and had to drink from the garden hose / garden faucet, and pee in the bushes. We also had like 10+ apple trees. It wasn’t that bad. A bit boring sometimes.

        But that’s because it was outside and I could get my needs covered and meet friends.

        Locked inside without these needs covered for extended periods is a lot worse in my opinion. Even cats and dogs have those needs covered.

        It’s also about the lack of freedom when locked inside.

        I would not treat my own children like I was treated, and especially not like you were.

  • dual_sport_dork 🐧🗡️@lemmy.world
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    14 days ago

    Reading.

    Or rather, how so many people seem fear and avoid it, or can’t do it. Something like 21% of adults in the US are illiterate, and the majority – 54% – read at or below a 6th grade level.

    I’ve been a sight reader probably since I was about six years old. I absolutely cannot look at any words legibly written in my native language and not understand them. You couldn’t force me to look at words written in English and not digest them if you held a gun to my head. I fear no wall of text, no matter how tall it is.

    It takes some effort to wrap your head around the notion that not only can most people not do this, but statistically speaking most or at least a plurality of people have to struggle or exert conscious effort to read and many of them are loathe to do so. And roughly one in five people simply can’t. This did not sink in for me when I was younger.

    I can’t imagine having to live my life that way. You nerds have seen how much bullshit I write in a day; I’d go absolutely bats.

    • Angry_Autist (he/him)@lemmy.world
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      14 days ago

      As a kid I kept asking librarians why libraries were so empty of people if they had so many books and it took me years to understand the sadness in her shrug.

  • Nangijala@feddit.dk
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    15 days ago

    Having near constant racing thoughts and always feeling like you have to work on something and if you don’t it makes you anxious. I thought my boyfriend was the alien for being able to not think about anything at all and just chill and do nothing.

    • 𝕱𝖎𝖗𝖊𝖜𝖎𝖙𝖈𝖍@lemmy.world
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      15 days ago

      Ah good ole ADHD. I have a love hate relationship with mine. We’re on speaking terms.

      I like to describe it as being simultaneously bored and overstimulated (tbf that’s also how I describe ADHD sex)

      • Nangijala@feddit.dk
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        15 days ago

        Irony is, that I’m not diagnosed so officially I’m just someone with racing thoughts and a restless soul.

  • taxiiiii@lemmy.world
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    14 days ago

    Nobody “dresscoded” me at home. As soon as I was old enough to pick my own clothing, I could. What skirts or jeans or dresses I wore was my choice completely. My school also didn’t care much.

    Blew my mind when I realized how many other girls had to sneak out with their clothes because the parents had a rule against tight jeans or whatever.

    I still think my parents were right with this one. The kids with the strictest rules were always those with the craziest outfits. Can’t blame them, I’d have done the same.

    • VitoRobles@lemmy.today
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      14 days ago

      When I was a teen, I believed in that too. The most strict parents had the most wild kids.

      As an adult, it’s now verified.

      • Psychadelligoat@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        14 days ago

        My parents were the chill, openly weed-smoking guys that wouldn’t rat you out to your parents if you needed help (like a place to stay while coming down or whatever)

        This policy was explicitly because my dad worked yard supervision at the local elementary schools and 100% knew that those with the strictest parents were the ones who needed it the most as they had nowhere safe to go. The abused kids were second, many of them were neglect babies in our area so they got fucked up and went home to parents who didn’t care

        I went to a charter school for my freshman year that was mostly full of people who were kicked out of the school they kick you out of if you’re a problem child. Almost all of them were children of parents who worked long-ass days and came home to be strict as fuck

        • PraiseTheSoup@lemm.ee
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          14 days ago

          Why were you at the charter school with all the naughty kids if your parents were super chill allies?

          • Psychadelligoat@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            14 days ago

            New school, so it was their (bad kids) only option, parents were trying something out because they got sold on it

            Ended up being a bad idea overall for many reasons, that was a big one

  • dingus@lemmy.world
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    16 days ago

    I remember one day realizing it was odd that my dad would hug my mom but my mom would never hug him back. She would just stand there and let him hug her. Yeah he was an abusive husband and I was very happy for her when she finally left him after over a decade!