I’m at a friend’s place and the cat keeps bringing in dead (or half-dead) animals into the house. It’s my understanding that cats think we are big, helpless kittens that don’t know how to hunt. Hence, they think they are doing us a favour.
It seems like a few mice actually escaped and found refuge in some walls in the house, so these “presents” are actually more than just annoying (and smelly if the dead animal ends up behind the couch).


The cat may actually belong to the Mafia, but he’s not strong enough to bring a horses head to you.
You should watch your back regardless.
I’ll give him an offer he can’t meow at…
You come to me in my house on the day that my daughter is to puke in the clean laundry, and ask me not to do murder?
Well there are worse bodily ececrements she could do on the clean laundry…
I was gonna say “spray” but figured people would be like “why isn’t your cat fixed??”